How To Make Your Relationship More Exciting

Throughout my professional career I've come across many people that were lacking excitement in their relationship. Many of them have experienced some form of it in the beginning of their relationship- but they all seem to ask me the same question..."where did all the fun go...and how can I get it back?"

I know that when you're starting a new relationship it may be fun, exciting, and there are few arguments (if any). Someone even compared it to buying a new car and having that new car smell. But what happens after all the fun stops?

Here's what you can do to get the fun back:

1. Show your creative side. When it comes to making a successful, long-lasting relationship, sometimes we need to think outside of the box. Coming up with fresh ideas for love and romance (or even where the next place you'll go to spend time together) could be the key to keeping your relationship thrilling.

2.Get Spontaneous. Do things "just because". Surprise your partner by planning a nice romantic getaway. Summer is here, so traveling around this time may be very enjoyable for the both of you.

3. Talk to your partner. Find out from your partner why your relationship is starting to get boring. Are there things going on in his/her life (bills, work, etc) that's stressing him/her out (this may be the reason for the lack of excitement)? Or is he/she just plainly losing interest in the relationship? Communicate with your partner to find out what's going on and then take it from there.

Whatever you need to do to make your relationship more exciting, then do it. You have to be the pro-active one if you want to get the love life that you desire.

Relationship Expert/ Professional Matchmaker Daniel Amis has helped many people create the relationship of their dreams. He publishes weekly E-zines that's inspiring, fun, and insightful. If you're ready to get the love that you desire, then subscribe at www.findyouridealmatch.com or www.relationshipadvice4you.com and get your FREE tips today!

3 Hints What Men Find Attractive in Woman

Girls are supposedly made up of sugar and spice and everything nice, so is that what men look out for in girls? Jokes apart, this question drives many girls crazy. They want to be sure that they do not lose the men they love and are willing to do anything to keep them secure in their company only.

While a few moments of browsing on the net for this topic will yield many results, why not ask one of your friends who is maintaining a successful relationship with her guy for quite some time? No girl wants to loose the guy she loves.

If you have the guts, you can just ask him point blank if he likes you or not. Though this seems a bit harsh, there actually are some types of guys who love this straightforward approach and love women who are frank. The flip side is that there are men who are authoritarian and you mist well end up losing him by posing such a query to him.

By the way, in order to have success with men, you need to know what men really find attractive in a woman. Below are the hints that usually men look out for in girls that can make him feel attracted:

1. Having a positive attitude

There are quite a number of girls who are nervous to approach the guys they love. They are not too sure about their looks and are afraid to get rejected by the guy. Not all fingers of the hand are same. While it is a fact that some girls are prettier than others, this is not the only thing that a guy looks for in a girl.

If your attitude is correct, you can be rest assured that it will help secure your relation. While some guys do go for pretty girls, the vast majority of guys like the company of girls who carries a bit of authority on her head. They prefer a girl who they will be proud to show of to their family and friends. Never try to act coy for this will turn him off real quick. Boys like girls who catch their eyes due to their personality.

2. Being intelligent

Are you smart & intelligent? If yes, then you have won half the battle. Men like girls who are intelligent and smart too. Some girls try to make up for their lack of intelligence by trying to dress themselves in provocative and revealing dresses.

If you want to have a new guy every other day there is no problem with this, but if you want a guy to stick with you, just forget this approach. Do show off your figure by all means but do not do it in such a way that it leaves a bad taste in the mouth of the guy’s friends and relatives.

3. Personal hygiene

Look after your personal hygiene: Guys hate girls who have a foul smelling mouth. Nobody likes to kiss an ashtray. Rather take some mint mouth fresheners if you are planning to kiss him. A well maintained body with a glowing skin goes a long way in making a girl attractive to boys.

Make up your hair so that it compliments your face. A properly maintained hair should frame the face. These hints are not my any means exhaustive, but it will surely help you to get in to the right track.

Does the man you're seeing really get the importance of a close and lasting relationship?

Or is he only in it with you until it stops being fun and easy for him?

If you aren't sure, and you find that men often start acting lazy or uninterested when it comes to exploring more than just a casual relationship with you...

Then it's time you stopped pretending to know what it takes.

And to discover what to do instead to inspire your man to want more with you than he's ever imagined wanting with another woman, go here: Catch and Keep Him

About the Author : For over 3 Years, Sarah Nichols has helped women everywhere become more of the a woman that men want.

She is now dedicated to helping as many women possible improve their relationships with men by not only showing them the knowledge that she has learned but by giving them the resources to other successful dating advice experts as well.

Visit Catch And Keep Him to Learn How To Find, Attract, And KEEP The Man You've Always Wanted...

How to Talk to a Man - Five Secrets Every Woman Should Know by Tonja Weimer

Do you know how to talk to your man? Is your boyfriend the silent type, not telling you what he thinks or feels? When you ask him questions and try to get him to open up, does he seem to go farther away? Is he confused about what you want from him?

Talking to men can be difficult if you don't understand how they are wired. Even if your guy is the talkative type, he still may not be good at sharing thoughts, feelings, or sentiments that are of any depth. Would you like to know the five secrets in how to talk to a man? Here are some facts that may surprise you and guide you:

1. You cannot talk to men the way you talk to other women.

Women are almost always ready to share. If you woke your girlfriend up at three in the morning to tell her the details of your fight with your boyfriend, she could tune into what you are saying in about five seconds. Conversely, if you woke your boyfriend up to tell him anything important, it would be the equivalent of a bee sting. He would be jolted, disoriented, and a little mad. He would need twenty minutes to regroup and hear what you are saying.

SECRET #1: Don’t approach men for conversation when they are not in an approach mode. Give them time and opportunity to be able to listen to you. They want to be there for you and give you what you need, but you have to understand that they need to have distractions removed, time to focus on the conversation, and a clear and defined understanding of what you want from them.

2. Men have been programmed for centuries to take care of the family.

When you take any complaint to him, even if you are only crying because your hair came out green instead of blonde, he unconsciously thinks it is his fault. If a man feels he is not taking good care of you, (and complaints are translated into thinking you are not happy with him,) he experiences tremendous physiological discomfort. He hears your problem as HIS failure. Withdrawal is his protection in these situations.

SECRET #2: Don’t misinterpret the silent male or underestimate how much you mean to him. He is highly vulnerable to you.

3. Men do not heal from emotional wounds as well as women do.

Who cares more for their lover, men or women? If you answered men do, you would be right. In general, after divorce, men re-marry sooner than women do, don’t live as long as their ex-wife does, and their suicide levels go up more. When a man sees silence in the relationship, he thinks everything is fine. However, if a woman is not talking, she is probably planning to leave. Only 50% of men in a troubled relationship know there is a problem. The rest say they never saw the breakup coming.

SECRET #3: You give meaning to your guy’s life. You matter far more to him than either of you realize. Be careful and kind with your words.

4. Men relate to other people better by doing activities with them.

Women get a chemical hit from talking. Men do not experience this rush of feeling good when they are talking to someone. They often feel that words get in the way of experiencing the moment. Men get a rush of good feelings when they are taking action or are engaged in physical activity. They also love to share activities with their favorite woman.

SECRET #4: Find at least one activity that you both have a passion for and do it together. This strengthens your bond and gives him a sense of success.

5. Men love routine.

Men take comfort in routine. To change schedules, plans, or even homes, is upsetting for him. He wants his time to be free from turmoil so he can hyper focus and concentrate on taking care of his work, and ultimately, the family.

SECRET #5: Build some loving routines together. You might think that you are both just wordlessly watching TV, while he might see that activity as part of your togetherness. Predictable patterns in your relationship keep him grounded.

The above five secrets can change the level of happiness in your relationship. Add kindness and nurturing, and if you have chosen a good guy, you will have a new best friend. This is how you talk to a man.

About Tonja Weimer:

· Columnist: Weekly syndicated singles and dating columnist (over four million readers in the U.S. and Canada)

· Media: Coverage on TV, including CNN’s ShowBiz Today; rave reviews in USA Today, Entertainment Weekly, Publisher’s Weekly

· Author: NBC/USA TV Network, selected author for articles on dating and singles for website

· Articles: In House Beautiful, New Woman, GRAND, and other national magazines

· Coach: Master Certified Singles Relationship Coach; Associate Certified Life Coach; International Coach Federation; Relationship Coaching Institute; Institute for Life Coach Training

· Keynote Speaker: Regional, National and International conferences in U.S., India and Europe

· Academic: BA; MA in Human Development; U.S. Dept of Mental Health full fellowship

· Published Author: 7 Books(Fingerplays for Children; Creative Movement for Children, etc) winning over 25 awards.

What Women Want From Men; Dating and Relationships by Toni Coleman

Dear Dating Coach - I have been dating a woman for almost three months. Lately, I have been confused about her behavior and need help to understand what is going on with us and what I can (should) do about it. Our relationship has gone from her calling me "sweetie" and asking for more intimacy; to telling me that I am pressuring her and need to stop pushing so hard. I have no problem going at whatever pace she is comfortable with, and I have told her this. In the past few weeks she has cancelled plans on several occasions, saying that she needs time to think because she feels afraid and uncertain about things. When I ask her to share her feelings with me, she becomes defensive and asks me to leave her alone. I have told her to do what she needs to and I will be here when she is ready. After several days of no contact she did call and ask me about my weekend plans. This is becoming very confusing. Do you have any ideas about what I could do to break this cycle and/or what she may be afraid or concerned about?

When I received this email, my first thought was that the problem seemed obvious- at least to me. Her feelings had changed. The reasons were unclear, and somehow they didn't seem to be as important as the simple truth that it was over. But perhaps they really were. After all, if he could gain some understanding of what went wrong it could help him to make the right decisions now and avoid repeating this pattern in future relationships. Therefore, my advice to him included a recommendation that he ask her for honest feedback regarding her feelings about him and the relationship. Armed with a carefully scripted and thought out approach to the subject, he was increasing his chances of opening up a useful dialogue with her that at the very least, could offer him the insight and closure he needed.

After careful preparation, he arranged for a talk about "them". Things got off to an ok start, however she soon began to act defensively and then shut down, essentially refusing to discuss her feelings or answer his questions directly and/or with candor. This left him with a decision. Should he step back from pursing this discussion with her, just maintaining the status quo; or should he take action based on what he believed was the problem and what would be in his best interest over time. He struggled with making this choice because he was able to rationalize her behavior and make up plausible excuses for what was happening. This left him with (false) hope and a feeling of powerlessness.

As a dating coach, I receive (and answer) many emails from men like the one above. My advice is based on the knowledge and expertise gained from years of experience in working with the complex dynamics that occur between people. However, as the world of meeting and dating continues to evolve; I have found it useful to talk to the people who are out there living it, and gather their insights and observations. I asked a group of 20-30 something, professional, single women to share their thoughts and reactions to the above email. Our discussion also covered their likes/dislikes, turn-ons and offs and the qualities they look for in a potential partner. I wanted candid, unedited comments that I could share with this writer and with all the guys out there who are confused by the behavior of the women they are meeting and dating.

Their feedback on the email question was fairly consistent. His girlfriend's feelings had changed. They believed she wanted to break things off but didn't know how to or was uncomfortable being the bad guy. One woman shared that in at least one of her past relationships, she had behaved very badly towards him, hoping HE would end it. Another woman stated, "There are women out there who act very lovingly in order to get a guy, then become who they really are once they have him." All agreed that he should end it and give himself the chance to meet someone who is ready for a relationship and truly wants one with him.

On the subject of men who turn them on, the women came up with similar attributes and ranked them in order of importance. Sense of humor and intelligence topped the list. We discussed these as critical components in friendship and compatibility. Attributes such as stable, mature, positive, loving and good father material all weighed in equally as close seconds with the 30 somethings. The younger women stated that they have not given much thought to the importance of those things yet. All of the woman said that their ideal guy had to be the right type, even though the two groups differed somewhat in their preferred type. Adjectives like clean cut, polished, conservative, not too conservative, very confident and with a certain style of dress- were used to describe Mr. Right. All of the women said that it was important to them that their man be assertive, ambitious and able to earn a good living. They felt this was important in order to have a family someday and/or have more lifestyle options available to them. When one of the women shared her need for a good listener, who "doesn't try to fix the problem", all of the women said, "yes" in a strong chorus.

When I asked for their list(s) of turn-off's and pet peeves; the conversation turned to physical attraction, which had little mention in the first part of our discussion. All stressed the importance of good sexual (and overall) chemistry. They cited attributes such as "too frail", "crooked teeth" and "overly muscled" as deal breakers for them. The younger group of women placed a greater emphasis on looks and a need for excitement in their relationships. All agreed that they would not choose a partner who was lacking in ambition and/or who was egotistical and (most likely) unable to be the other half of a giving and supportive union.

The subject of dating brought up the greatest difference in views between the two age groups. The younger women had a less defined view of what a date is. Meeting at a bar, a last minute get together and sharing the tab were all seen dating, when out with a non-platonic friend. However, the 30 somethings felt a date should be arranged ahead of time with one person (formally) asking the other one out. All felt that the woman should at least offer to split the tab, but that the man should always pick up the check. All agreed that "hooking-up" and "booty calls" are not dates.

The women all said that when they really like a guy their feelings are expressed in the way they treat him. One woman stated that words are not the way women usually express their interest- especially early in a relationship. Everyone agreed that a man can know how a woman feels by the nice things she does for him. If she shows a lot of interest in him, cares about what he has to say, and wants to know what is going on in his life- she really likes him.

Lastly, we discussed the telltale signs of a woman's lack- or loss- of interest. They will not answer (or return) calls, say they are busy/unavailable or use some indirect way to communicate their disinterest. The key point they all agreed on is that women "are taught to be nice, not mean." This is probably why you guys out there are so confused when a woman says one thing and does another.

The differences between men and woman have been talked about in books, portrayed in film and used in some of the best punch lines. This us/them emphasis seems to have contributed to the misinterpretations and poor communication that so many singles lament. This dating coach thinks that dating and relationship communication will be improved when men and women learn to listen to, and really hear, what each other are saying (verbally and non-verbally). Deep listening without an assumption that interpretation and translation is required should help to bring clarity, openness and candor. Imagine a dating game where everyone speaks the same language and there are rules for fair play. I'm already imagining an inbox that is not constantly overflowing.

Toni Coleman, MSW is a licensed psychotherapist, relationship coach and founder of http://www.consum-mate.com As a recognized expert, Toni has been quoted in many local and national publications including: The Chicago Tribune, The Orlando Sentinel, New York Daily News, Indianapolis Star and Newsweek newspapers and Family Circle, Woman's Day, Cosmo Style, Tango, Men’s Health, Star (regularly quoted body language expert), and Nirvana magazines. She has been featured on abcnews.com; discovery.health.com; aolnews.com; MSN.com, Match.com and planetearthradio.com. Toni offers dating help and relationship advice as the weekly love and dating coach on the KTRS Radio Morning Show (St. Louis, MO) and through her syndicated column, “Dear Dating Coach.” Her newsletter, The Art Of Intimacy, helps over fifty-five hundred subscribers with its dating and relationship advice. Toni is a member of The International Coach Federation, The International Association Of Coaches and The National Association of Social Workers.